two exams
two victories.
two more battles


"There are only two truly infinite things, the universe and stupidity. And I am unsure about the universe." -- Albert Einstein

taken from the insomniac's new bible.

i don't know about the universe.. but i definitely agree about the infinite stupidity. i'm surrounded by it!



Tuesday, 30th October 2001
Virgo (Aug 24 - Sep 23)

As a cautious Virgo you are always inclined to feel apprehensive when you encounter a large amount of optimism or enthusiasm. It immediately makes you feel that you can smell a rat and thus the only thing it makes you inspired to do is to set a rat-trap. I wish that I could offer your sense of pessimism something more reassuring, but I remain obliged to honour my duty as a reporter of important portents. Your current outlook is exemplary. I can see no reason why anything should go wrong. I am sorry if this makes you feel uncomfortable.

yeah right.
when everything is haywire
this guy says "Your current outlook is exemplary. I can see no reason why anything should go wrong."




there is no dearth of selfish people in this world.


i definitely don't like to go where i'm not invited.

The Doctor Is In

well. i didn't feel anything at the time of the accident.
i was numb.

and now. i'm doomed.
with a low blood pressure of 78/52
the doctor said,
"how the hell are you even standing up.. leave alone laughing and joking?"

and i said, "i guess i got used to all this.. there's so many other things on my mind.. and my health is nowhere near the top ten"

well here's what the problem is:
numbness in my right arm and leg.
tingling sensation at the tip of my toes and fingers.
a low blood pressure (78/52)
inflammation of muscles and tissue in my back, the whole right part of my body.
severe muscle spasms
my spine is straight as a stick!
no wonder the back ache was so horrendously unbearable.

so i'm on therapy.
and plenty of medication
(that makes me drowsy the whole fucking day!)
the doctor thinks i'm still in high school
and gives me a doctor's note!!!

can you believe that?

.. i can't write anymore..


ok so a lot has happened over the weekend.

i'll start with the good:

Friday, October 19th, 2001:
met up with MW
and that was probably the best thing i could ask for.

he made me laugh.
he made me smile.
and he noticed my eyes!


well, i dont like being down or depressed.
and i try and find ways of cheering me up
as no one else will try and cheer me up
so i go and buy me some pretty Turquoise Colorblends

and all people say is
"you look different"
one thing's for sure..
they can't take their eyes
off my face

i felt it too
i felt different
not necessarily good different
not bad either
just different

i look shrewd
street smart
in my

normally i look
and there's that
tinge of innocence too.


now the bad

Saturday, October 2oth, 2001:
10 am already!
and the doctor is in.
she said, "be here before 1pm, sweety"
that nice doctor.

so ma and i are cruising along
in my pretty passat
and there comes this red light
i stop.

a black honda passport in front of me
at a distance of about 3 feet.
another box-ish car behind me
at a distance of about 2 feet.

my tummy growls
and i make plans
i turn towards ma

"lets go to dunkin donuts"

everything bagel with veggie cream cheese.

i'm still thinking this..
and i notice this side street
and one way
well, towards me.

i'm still thinking this..
and i see this huge tow truck
speeding on a street
where he shouldn't be

i'm still thinking this..
and i notice a violation
this tow truck's not stopping at the stop sign
and he's coming towards me!


< j a w d r o p >
< c o m m e r c i a l b r e a k >


< b a c k a f t e r t h e b r e a k >

the next thing i know
i freeze every single muscle
in my body
to brace an impact
that i see hurtling towards me

BOOM (banging into the SUV)
BHISKAAW (tearing apart my pretty passat)
BANG (hubcap and front bumper tearing away from the body.. and hurtling on the road)
VAROOOMM (the tow truck taking off!)

the first words that come to mind:


he actually hit the SUV in front of me
and he ACTUALLY hit my pretty passat!


i had to be calm.
i had to be strong.
ma was on the verge of tears.
and there's no way i'd show i was weak.

i'm a control freak.

i see the SUV chase the tow truck
and i hear people yell in the background
"don't move. stay as you are. you're worse hit.
the cops should know the exact position of your car

i got out of the car
i registered his licence plate number in my brain
and i called 9-1-1

i told ma to sit in the car
and i looked straight into her eyes and said
"don't worry. trust me".
i had no fucking clue what i was saying
but i knew i was saying something.
it made me feel better.

i see the tow truck stop
about two blocks from ground zero.
i see him stop
and the SUV too.

this guy from the audience
(we've collected a great big audience by now)
hands me a piece of facial tissue
with the name of the tow truck company.
and all i could mutter was
a half-swallowed thanks.
i meant it though.

sirens, i hear

cop: "what happened?"
me: "two of us were hit buy a tow truck..he took off.. that way"
cop: "stay where you are"

emt-1: "are you ok, ma'am"
emt-2: "are you hurt.. is anyone hurt?"
( and all stupid me could think of was.. oooh. emt-2 is cute)

me: "uh.. yeah i'm ok.. my ma's in the car.. she's shaken up"
emt-2: " i'm going to carry all the pieces of your car and bring it onto the sidewalk"
(he inspects all the pieces.. and says "this is garbage... you might as well throw it all away")

my heart crumbled to a million pieces.

cop is back.

cop: "we have to move your car out of harm's way... ma'am do you think you could move your car?"
me: "umm.. i don't think i can drive right now.. i feel a bit weak in the knees"
(oh shit! signs of weakness.. I AM SHOWING SIGNS OF WEAKNESS!.. oh no oh no.. this can't be happening to me!)

emt-2: "i'll move the car for you"
(umm.. ok cutie.. i'll just follow you blindly)

cop does the whole routine.. i tell him everything..

cop: "well, his excuse is his brakes don't work too well.."
me: ' OH YEAH?! how the fuck does he then stop two blocks away?"

he was too DRUNK!
and he looked PSYCHO too.

i finish the whole routine
exchange address
phone numbers
insurance info
police reports


and all i wanted was someone to be there besides me.
to support me.


< b a c k a f t e r a m u c h n e e d e d e m o t i o n s - s o r t i n g b r e a k >

back to reality.
so i have to take the car for an appriasal tomorrow.
and i have to do a thorough research on the insurance details.
and all the things i'm entitled to.

many people say i must pursue a case.
i'm not sure.

i've never had to deal with insurance and accidents and lawyers before.
and i'm completely lost. :(

any ideas/suggestions?


Each morning sees some task begin,
Each evening sees it close;
Something attempted, something done,
Has earned a night's repose.

-- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow


life's a bitch!

and so am i.


a lot has changed.

there are times i feel good
and then, at times, i feel used.

i never learn
people always use me
abuse me

and walk away.
without even looking back.


so ishu (my siamese-mix kitten)
loves to go out!


the moment i put on my shoes
look for my jacket
she's at the door!

she should be a dog!
or a kangaroo
(cuz she jumps/hops around like one)
or a crab
(cuz sometimes she walks/jumps sideways)

she's hilarious!





help me!

i kick my ass good-bye.


so i need someone to slap
me back to my senses.

for i know not what i do.


so the area surrounding my apartment building
has been cordoned off by the cops.

and there's an FBI office somewhere around there.

holy poop!
which means everytime i drive out of the parking garage, i have to
park the car
get out of the car
walk towards the cop
show my id
move a barricade
walk back to the car
start the car
drive past the barricades
park the car
come back
place the barricade in its original position
walk back to the car
start the car
smile at the cop
and drive off.


as if i didn't have enough to do.




this is soooooo funny! i think i got this forward way back in '98.. but it still cracks me up! hahahah

A little boy walked into his mom and dads room while they were fighting. The dad yelled, "You bitch!" And the mom screamed, "You bastard!" And the little boy, "Mommy, Daddy what does that mean???" And the parents replied "Um...ladies and gentlemen." And with that answer the little boy ran off to bed.

The next night the parents were really horny, the dad said "Nice tits!" And the mom, "Nice dick!" And the little boy ran into the room and asked, "Mommy, Daddy what does that mean???" "Um...hats and coats." And with that answer the little boy ran back to bed.

The next day was Thanksgiving and all of the relatives were going to be eating and celebrating at the little boys house. The little boy was on his way up the stairs and ran into the bathroom. When he swung the door open it hit his dad's elbow, (the dad was shaving and he cut himself) "Shit!" He bellowed. "Daddy what does that mean???" "Um, it is the name of the shaving cream that I'm using, now run downstairs and see what your mom is doing." And with that the little boy did as he was told. Meanwhile his mom was slicing the turkey, and she accidentally put her finger in the wrong place. "Fuck!" She hollered and the little boy said , "Mommy, what does that mean???" "Um, it means I'm cutting the turkey."

DING-DONG the door bell rang and the little boy scampered off to answer it saying: "Hello all of you bitches and bastards, hang up your titties and dicks. Dad's up stairs whipping the shit off of his face and mom's in the kitchen fucking the turkey!"


'sale' phone..


some people.
they never learn.


a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z.

hah. finally i learned all the alphabets in order.. i had actually gotten the order all confused..

all these years i thought the alphabets were something like this:


my dumb ass is really dumb! :-p


sorry i was asleep when you left.
all the best.



Every oak tree started out
as a couple of nuts who stood
their ground.


i am a little lost
a little quiet
and sad.

is it the season?

i never let weather affect me.
i love this weather.

maybe i need to go see my doctor again.

i dont have a doctor anymore.

have to change my pcp.

this must be the most boring entry ever on foolmaker's site.


its been 2 weeks since i got Ishu
my siamese-mix kitten.

and i've never been happier.
maybe once.
but that's it.

she's gorgeous.
and she's DA BOMB.

she's the one who gets the looks
people (even strangers)
feel this bonding
with her.

they just can't take their eyes of her.

many say she's a mini-me

she's got stripes on her left hind leg
5 stripes.

and she's got antenna
that are probably longer
than the strands of hair
on my head.
(no. i'm not bald.)
(my hair is definitely longer than the average girl)

she's an alien.

so who says aliens
are not drop dead

maybe i'm alien too ;)
i flatter myself.


"stressed-out" is my middle name.

Linear Algebra
Operating Systems
Internet Technology
Discrete Structures II
Computer Architecture

a little kitten

a lot of family

and no me.


stressed-out is definitely my middle name.


the item looks delumptious (delicious + scrumptious)

just because you ordered an item
doesn't mean you cannot look at the other items.

i can.
and i will.


can anyone tell me how to deal with RIP packets

happy birthday, mon ami.

i love you.