there is something that i badly want. so far at least, the possibility of me getting that is highly unlikely. and this friggin thing is causing me to feel not so much frustrated, as insecure. for a while, i was quite sure i was on the right track pursuing the right objective for the right reason, then it all started to go wrong.
now, i am trying to understand why.
have i made some monumental mistake? should i rethink all my goals and plans?

i know not what to do.