i feel torn apart felt that way most of my life and still feel so and i hate it when i get that sinking feeling after i have had too many laughs throughout the day because i know that by the time i get into bed i will have either upset someone or have a fight/argument with someone and that's exactly what happened today i knew i shouldn't have laughed that much sigh i'm stupid in some ways because i never learn oh well i hope this will pass.

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on a different note: thanks to all my friends who remember that my birthday is coming up.. and i would appreciate it if you please dont spoil me with any kind of gifts. i will love to see some love in my mailbox though :-)